Learning to be with Things As They Are

Being with your experience.  This is the basis of practice.  It is practice because it is not something we are able to do very easily.  Sounds like it should be easy, but if we take a closer look at what it is we do in order to not be with our experience we begin to realize how disconnected we really are.  So we practice simply being with every arising and passing moment as best we can.  We get distracted, that’s normal, we bring ourselves back with all the kindness and patience we can muster.

As we learn to be with our experience, we notice all sorts of things pop up.  One is how we label everything we sense.  If we hear a noise or smell a smell or see something, a thought, any sensation that arises is instantly categorized and judged to be good, bad, or neutral.  Pleasant, painful, or indifferent. 

Another thing we may notice about our experience is that it flavors the next experience.  If we like something we will move towards it, if we don’t, we will want to get away from it.   If our minds are in a good mood, then we may experience things in a positive light.  Or if we are in a bad mood, nothing seems to be going our way.

What we experience is influenced by conditions.  The conditions of having a body and how it feels, the sensations that arise in the body and in the mind give rise to what we experience.  We have control over some of these conditions, but others, we do not.  We are interested in learning to set up favorable conditions that give rise to joyful states of mind, learning to see what those are.  Also learning to see those conditions that create states of mind that are less than ideal for happiness.  And we are becoming acquainted with the conditions we cannot change.  When we see that things are they way they are, that they arise in dependence upon myriad conditions that are beyond our control, then we can cultivate an attitude that is accepting.  This is not to say that if we cannot make a change for the better that we should not do so, what I am suggesting is that when we see clearly that something is arising that creates disharmony in our experience, that we learn to develop a capacity to be with it in a kind and compassionate way. 

Meditation is a wonderful working ground for us to begin to learn to change and accept with kindness what is.  As we practice developing some insight into how our experiences are co-created, we learn to find some peace.